Unconditionally

Hanya Engkau
Yang bisa
Menerima semua cacat-celaku
Membuka tangan untuk semua rapor merahku
Menutup mata untuk semua kepalsuan dan kemunafikanku
Membuka pintu untuk tubuh teler fana dan aroma kemabukan duniawiku

Ampunilah…
For so many times I tried to cheat You
Over and over I tried to ignore You
Tak bosan-bosan kucoba menguji cintaMu

I pretend You’re not there
I treat You like You’re nobody to me
I don’t call or say Your name
I even mengingkari namaMu
I pretend You don’t know what I’m doing
I pretend that I’m not Yours

The disgusting me

mengkhianatiMu
sungguh memicu adrenalin
menarik, menantang dan melenakan

menyakiti hatiMu
sungguh mudah, mulus dan tanpa hambatan
sungguh manis dan meninabobokan

menduakanMu
sungguh menggoda dan menggiurkan

sebab Engkau
sungguh baik
terlalu baik
sungguh setia
terlalu setia
sungguh mencinta
terlalu mencinta
tak layak bagi manusia bejat sepertiku
too much for
a wretch like me.

You never even ask,
’How dare you did this to Me?’
‘Why did you do this to Me?’
‘What else in the world I wouldn’t do for you to cause you do such things to Me?’

But You’re silent.
Keep silent.
Still silent.

Yet
I saw You’re crying.
I know You’re crying.
I heard You’re crying.
I believe You’re crying.
I feel You’re crying.

What are You crying for?
Me?
What am I to You?
Am I that special to You?
Why?
Why do you love me that much?
So much that I sometimes couldn’t understand with my idiot brain?
Why?

Just know, You said
Just know,
That I love you.
That’s all you need to know.

Only You
Could love me
Unconditionally.
Tak bersyarat.

How am I ever gonna runaway from You again?